Saturday, April 4, 2009
Rock N Roll Nightmare
So this hilariously-mulletted 80's rocker decides to pay for a movie about his hair metal band recording (that's not part of the movie – that's actually why this movie exists). The movie starts with a woman being thrown into an oven while making breakfast for her family. Not sure how it happens, but that's where the husband finds her. Then cut to a 10 minute long scene of an 80's short-wheel-base conversion van drives on some roads. Yeah. When the stupid van stops like 13 people get out of it. This is the band and their girlfriends and their road manager. They have rented a farm house in Canada for a couple of months to rehearse and record in a barn. The only songs the people in the house listen to are their own band's. It's hilarious. And the outfits. Seriously, there's so much spandex I'm kind of scared. The drummer has a fake English accent. The singer rehearses in a silvery tux jacket with tails and no shirt underneath. And they sing the words "We live to rock" like 50 times in a row. They also play those headstock-less guitar popular with morons during the 80's. The killer is basically a handpuppet space herpe kind of creature. And the leader of the band, the guy that paid for everything and wrote the story ends up being an archangel and defeats Beelzebub. Stupidest/Cockiest story line ever. I really want to go on and on about this movie, but I won't. IF you like hair metal or like to make fun of it, then see this movie.
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