Starcrash

Two smugglers try to escape the galactic Po-lice and eventually get thrown in jail. Then all of a sudden, they are sprung by the same people that caught them. The sets, props, and special effects are hilariously 80's. The robot cop keeps mentioning how he has no logic or feeling circuits, but he certainly got a southern-drawl circuit (he also has nervous-ness, worry, and surprise circuits). I also have to mention the numerous hot outfits the girl smuggler seems to have at her disposal, similar to Reba McIntire, except they make you want to see even more skin, rather than less. The robot at one point yells, "LOOK! Amazons on horseback!!!" I'm guessing the robot wasn't programmed to know that Amazons come from Earth, and not all girls in skimpy leather outfits are Amazons. The animatronics of the robot guardian (who's clearly a woman, with breasts and bottle-cap nipples) make Clash of the Titans seem like a multi-billion dollar Hollywood film. I really should stop writing, but I can't. I'm laughing too hard. When smuggler boy gets a twinkle in his eye, he gets super kung fu powers. Ha ha ha. At one point, the robot does this hilarious Beavis & Butthead voice. Then, Knight Rider shows up, seriously, a VERY young David Hasselhoff. Smuggler boy shows up and starts kicking ass with a lightsaber he clearly stole from George Lucas. The smugglers complete their mission eventually. But then have to destroy the bad guy's super laser before he can blow up the Hoff's dad's imperial planet. Apparently, a "starcrash" is when you crash a flying city into a smaller ship (sounds like citycrash to me, but whatever).